Chapter 39, Page 2

Why this discrimination against infertile couples in India? Ironically, this is because of the high premium Indians have always placed on the family unit! The major role of the woman in Indian society was seen to be to have children to propagate the family name. Therefore, if a woman could not have children, she was singled out, ridiculed, ostracized and stigmatized! In fact, given the value Indians have placed on having children, infertile couples should actually receive even more tender loving care from others and be helped in their quest to complete their family! However, because of centuries of misconceptions and myths regarding infertility (for example, "a barren woman has been cursed by god, and is being punished for the sins of a prior life"), it will take a long time for social attitudes in India to change! Infertile couples are an easy and soft target for everyone - ranging from:

friends ("life is incomplete without a baby!");
in-laws ("when will I become a grandmother?");
relatives ("what do they want to earn money for - they do not have any children to leave it to!"),
neighbors ("they may have a lot of money, but what's the use, they don't have any children");
acquaintances (" no good news yet? Go and see this doctor my sister-in-law's cousin went to - he's the best!");
co-workers ("you don't have any kids, so can you stay on a little longer to finish this job - I need to go back to take care of my children!"); right to
servants ("the reason she shouts so much is because she doesn't have any children serves her right!)
(Gentle reader, if you recognize yourself here, please suffer a pang of guilt, and promise to improve your behavior the next time round!)

Many otherwise enlightened people take the attitude that infertility treatment is elective and even compare it to cosmetic surgery! However, infertility is a serious medical condition - it is both a disease and a life crisis! Others pontificate that these couples should just adopt a baby, rather than take treatment. While adoption is an excellent method of building a family for some couples, it is not acceptable to everyone and forcing couples to do so when they don't want to is very unfair.

A major problem is that infertile couples in India are too ashamed to stand up for their own rights - with the result that they often suffer in silence! However, infertility exacts a high toll! Not only do many marriages break up, many women are abused for being infertile as well. Also, infertile employees, because of the emotional stress they are under, are often not as productive in the workplace as they could have been if their problem was successfully resolved.

Fortunately, this discriminatory attitude is now being challenged by advocates for infertile couples - at least in the US! The path breaking Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) provides protection against discrimination for Americans with a disability - a disability being defined as" a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities." The US Supreme Court has clearly ruled that reproduction is a major life activity. Since infertility is a physical impairment that substantially limits the ability to reproduce, this means that if an individual experiences discrimination because of his or her infertility, a claim can be made that this is illegal under the ADA. Thus, a policewoman employed by the city of Chicago sued the city recently because it did not provide infertility insurance coverage. The court ruled that infertility is a disability under the ADA, and today the city of Chicago covers the cost of infertility treatment incurred by all its employees!

Many employers in India are not still aware of the issues and concerns facing those with infertility. Employers need to be more understanding of the special needs of those of their employees who are infertile, and be willing to make workplace accommodations for those undergoing infertility treatments - for example, allowing the employee to change her work schedule or to take some time off. Employers, insurance companies, and legislators in India also need to take steps to recognize that reproduction is a major life activity - and that infertile couples need all the help we can give them!

Unfortunately, most infertile couples in India do not feel comfortable speaking publicly about this very private struggle, even though they represent all racial, religious, socio-economic and ethnic groups, as well as both sexes. Infertility Friends, India's first support group for infertile couples, plans to actively lobby for recognition of infertility as a medical problem by insurance companies to enable members to benefit from Mediclaim and other medical insurance facilities.

We all need to remember that infertile couples are our neighbors, co-workers, friends and relatives - and they just want to experience the joy of raising a family - an experience that so many of us take for granted!

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Credits: How to Have a Baby: Overcoming Infertility